But for me it's a way too nostalgic that it reminded me of too many things especially those dismaying ones !
Get to meet up with many old friends,and at the same time,might accidentally meet with my exes. Its possibility is kinda high,if i've a choice,i'd rather choose not to come across them. The feeling is awful,and i MEAN it !
I cried every time i came across these situations,i dont know why it happened to be so,but i just burst into tears involuntarily.
Today i answered a call for my bro,and that caller happened to be one of my exes,and guess what? The feeling was seriously awful,AWFUL man !
Until now i still cannot be sure of whether i can let go of everything. Well,it's time to leave everything behind,new year,new start,new hope.
Words are always easier than actions. I always lamented on the same freaking thing since few years back,in fact it is always futile. =(
To be frank,im still not ready for a new relationship yet. Coz the missing piece of my heart still remains missing.
Too hard for me to trust another guy. My mindset now is that,some guys seem to be kind and near perfect in every aspects,but STILL,u'll never know what they will do to you in the end. They might just break ur heart into pieces,and that seriously hurts !!
Grrr !! Why am i crapping again,i told myself to avoid from thinking too much of silly things !
Mayb it's because of me,who still havent let go of certain things.
I.. seriously.. couldnt let go..of something. :'(
I hate to face anything regarding that relationship,i even thought of the death of myself would at least seek some attention from him.
I seriously dont mind if i get any kind of sickness which eventually leads to death,on behalf of my beloved ones,including my family.
Arghhh ! Should stop crapping,wouldnt want myself to cry during CNY,let me have an enjoyable CNY this year,seriously wishing !
Thought of these things is just like garnishing the wound in heart with plenty of salt. You're not me,so anyhow,u still dont understand how i feel.
Even if u try to put urself in my shoes,u might not understand,too.
I physically show you im strong,but internally/emotionally,im fragile. ):
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