*HATE = LOVE*

yesterday i saw my ex-bf[FKH],d one i love d most..
huhhh..
i always tell my frens tat i hate him to d core,i will not love him anymore,i hate him !!!
n cmk always says,"u hate him so much because u love him tat much"..
erm,formerly i didnt understand d phrase n i will argued wit her,saying tat i rili hate him..
but now i realised,tat phrase means it..
from d day i parted wit him till yesterday b4 i saw him,i rili hate him n never even replied his messages..
until last nite,i went to yumcha wit ah len,ah chow,phin n cmk,i met him..
he went yumcha wit my elder bro n i met my elder bro coz we promised to go home together..
we drove separate cars coz i was fetching 4 ppl n my bro was alone..
besides,we went yumcha at different places..
1st,my gang went to keong fong n yumcha there,later on we planned to get d skul magazine of our skul from lee kee..
so,i drove there n took d magazine..
i will keep d magazine coz i will return it back to lee kee after skul re-opens..
due to tat,we went to a food corner n yumcha there so tat d others can look through d magazine b4 i took it back home..
i chose tis place coz my bro was at somewhere there n i wanted to ask him wat time gonna go home..
so,i saw FKH there n i tried to evade him,we didnt say a single word or gaze at each other at d same time..
so,we went home at bout 1.30am..
my hands n legs kept on shiverring since i saw him till we reached home..
my mind was kinda vexed..
erm,sad..
d feeling of psycho came back again,cant b denied anymore,i rili couldnt forget him.. i tot i m strong enuf to hate him,not to think of him.. i tot i had rili stop loving tis person,i had stop missing him,stop being sad for him.. huhhh,i was wrong.. when i saw him back,i can feel tat i still miss him dearly..
after phin n cmk left my house,i went back to my room n cried..
my family members were all asleep..
so,i sms-ed phin n she accompanied me d whole nite..
i cried d whole nite,n didnt want to sleep till my dad woke up,n i was forced to sleep..
all these were exactly lik d time when i was psycho,being hurted deeply,n by d SAME PERSON..
i slept at around 5.15am..
i sent a greeting msg to him b4 i slept..
d next day[today],he sent me back a greeting msg n we sms-ed after tat..
we chatted for quite long n many topics,he asked whether will we have another chance to date again,but not now of cos,in future..
i tot for some time,n i replied him saying tat so far,i still dun wan to have a bf yet n future life will b determined in future..
dun think so much for now,so,now we are friends..
no doubt,both of us are missing each other very much..
but i think i will not have d 3rd time relationship wit him anymore..
being frens will b better,though..
today whole day i didnt eat,n it was exactly lik d time i was being a psycho,tears will drop even when i was doin my stuffs,watching tv n watsoever tat i did for d day..
luckily my mum didnt see me..
huhhh..
no worries,i will b ok very soon..
believe me,i will try my best to make everything in control,n hopefully i will b strong enuf to face anything tat might happen in d future..
*God bless..

*STUPID SAXXX*

i never being so annoyed in my life by a person who i didnt see b4,nor get to noe much bout himself..
wat the heck !!!! his name is SA***,formerly from sys,a stpm leaver,waitin' for result,d head of gangster..he got nth to do,like to disturb ppl around,sings like a frog,loves to bark like a dog around,crapping nonsenses,he is completely a bastard !!!! u bitch,nut,totally a crap!!! bloody shYt!!!
i m not here to condemn u if u never disturb me..
u r d one who started all these,if u never come n crap here n there,posting sth annoying,i will never scold u wit vulgar words..
u bitch,back off !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i voiced out properly,politely,n yet u trying hard to annoy me...
i never scold ppl so rudely b4 till i met u..
u told my fren u noe me,but i didnt noe u..
u came to my tagged profile n sent me a comment,n everything started there..
rili F***ing bitch..
budge off lar,do u noe u r humiliating ur skul,a lot!!!!
u think u can sing very well?? not at all,sing like a frog,worse than a frog.. still wan to criticize CMK's singing skill.. WTF !!! get lost lar,u think u r who??can criticize whoever u want?? NUT!!! BITCHY BITCH!!!!
n pls dun perasan so much,i m not asking u,dun answer when ppl never ask u,cant obey rules at all !!
dun come n ruin my blissful life,as well as my frens' !!
i bet SYS will ashame of u !!
sorie to others SYS guys,u r all very nice except tis SA***,he ruins ur whole skul..
dun criticize my skul,our conscience is clear,not like u!! BASTARD !!!
lastly,jz wan to accentuate here,dun disturb me if i did not disturb u!!!
tat's all for now,dun wan to blog on,or else i will burst !!!
huhhh!!!!

so sorie,i didnt mean to write so many vulgar/rude/bad words here,forgive me..
i never disturb ppl if they never create problems on me..
sorie if tis post offended any of u[except SA***],here i would like to appologize for it..

*LAST WARNING*

please seek my advice b4 i scold u..
duhhhh...
dun nudge me when i reply late a bit..
jz send me a msg,tat's it.. ok??
dun msg me after i told u tat my hp almost out of credit..
i always said wanna save credit,n ask u not to send me msg anymore till i reload my another number..
so,pls listen n dun send me msg asking silly questions..
i scolded u jz now n very sorie,u appologized too..
it's ok..
today my mood is not tat good,moreover,having flu now..
sneezing non-stop..
yesterday sneezed more than 100times,wow.. rili felt like goin to die..
nose gonna detach from my face..
huhhh...
one more thing,wat did the crew seimbas done on our skul magazine..
1st page,head prefect's speech[my silly speech],huhh..
inside somemore got my house address,my hp number,my msn address,fs blah22...
wow,no more privacy..
cant wait to have a look on d magazine..
huhhh..
tat's all for now,rili tired dy..

*A BRAND NEW YEAR*

a brand new year,brand new life,brand new start,brand new style,brand new..errr.. everything..
lolx..
but in these two days[1st n 2nd of Jan],seemed lik too much frustration for me..
personally,i hate tis kind of feeling..
so irritating,made me feel moody..
althou' at last they were solved,but still in between,i felt moody for those events..
actually most of them were bout frens lar..
erm,jz feel lik being fooled around..
huhhhhh...
wat are frens for,i wonder.. frens are forever,i noe..
but nth guarantees tat frens dont betray u,they will n yet they pretend tat they dont noe anything.. holy SHIT !!
everything will b fine,jz forget n forgive,n i did it..
2 cases,one last nite,one tonite,i shud said there two mornings coz they happened jz after midnite..
not to mention here,no mood to recall back those sorrowful thingy..

one more thing to b stressed here..
bout love life.. dont b offended,i m not pointing tis on anyone..
jz sth tat i wanted to say long time ago but never done.. so,now i want to mention it here..
sometimes love hurts,but it cheers up both of them too..
dun understand y arguments always occur jz bcoz of some rili small matters..
i admit,usually those who wrong 1st are gurls.. no doubts,including myself..
i did a lot of those..
erm.. but now d main focus not on me,it's on public,i mean to all of us..
please dun angry on ur bf/gf jz bcoz they did sth very normal,not exorbitant,for instance,he/she praises another boy/girl handsome/pretty.. [ tis is a very common example which everyone noes,even we always watch in tv]
praising them doesnt mean tat he/she likes him/her..
if ur bf/gf praises u,he/she means it.. if then dont,they are honest to u,respect u..
so,pls dun angry wit them on small matter lik tis..
tis is a very common thing tat i wan to stress here..
so,i would lik to wish every couple,including my frens who has bf/gf,hope tat u all will love each other more n argue less..

tat's all for now,it's ady 3am lor..
wanna sleep coz tomoro drivin' to ipoh n need to wake up early..
lolx..