*SOUR HEART*

dear,sorie ar..
i made tis decision not to hurt u.. not to make u unhappy..
i jz dun wan to let u love me mor,n at last u will hurt mor..
as time grows,u will love me mor n mor,n if i break wit u tat time,surely i will hurt u much mor greater..
actually i didnt expect u to 4giv me.. but i noe u wont angry wit me,n u always say.."mayb i m not good enough"
seriously,u r good.. a good bf too..
but it's jz tat,tat kind of feeling doesnt exist..
if we still carry on,i'm sure i will find a lot of rubbish reasons to avoid u..
i feel guilty larrrrr.......
i even cried in skul.. hahax.. *ashamed*
i did my revision in skul,but at last still on d same page when skul ended..
hahaxx... noe y?? i looked at d book,stared hard on it,but it was lik transparent.. i couldnt concentrate at all... dun noe wat d hell i read..
a lot of things rushing through my mind.. get me distracted..
my malay frens even asked me wat happen,they said i looked sth wrong oni..
my assistant asked me too,haixxx... nth larr...
i sot jor jek.. later ok d lor...

today d whole day i didnt eat.. no mood lerrr...
but i dun noe y.. i shouldnt feel sad wat,i "fei" ppl,still wan to sad..
i rili dun wan to cheat u n myself.. loving wit an insincere heart,same as cheating jek.. not much difference i suppose..
i didnt hav tis kind of feeling b4,when we chatted in msn today.. i felt a kind of feeling,undescribeable..
he gav me a kind of feeling,totally different from usual.. i can feel d sadness in him..
in fact,he was a cheerful,happy go lucky person.. everytime i chat wit him,sure i can feel his happy tone.. but today totally no,i cant feel any happy tone nor cheerful spirit..
i felt very guilty,mayb i made a wrong decision..
i should take him as my best friend at 1st,he can rili cheer me up..
after i accepted him oni i realized.. too late.. so,i decided tis so tat i wont hurt him even deeper in future time..
tat's d point i broke up wit him or else i m jz cheating him n myself as well..
i m sure he can find a better 1,much mor better than me..
cheer up every1..
i can fulfil ur request,we r still d best pair of "darling-honey"..
thanx 4 wat u did 4 me all these while..
thanx.. n sorie 4 wat i did..