*SAD N VEX*

arghhh !!!!!!!!
help !!!!!!!!
felt terribly bad recently..
sunday n monday went to play badminton,n i didnt eat for 2 days..
arghhh !!!!!!!!!!
felt vexed lots,n anger rising !!!!!
my hand ached,my legs ached !!!
studies things are so vexatious !!!!!! ARGH!!!!!
sunday my brother called back,i was telling him bout d house tat we have to rent at KL for out studies next month..
ah len's fren hasnt confirm which house we gonna rent..
so,decided nothing till now..
i told my bro bout tat n he was lik scolding me,forcing me to hurry my fren..
hey,come on lar!!! want ppl to help me,i still wan to hurry ppl,ridiculous ryte??!!!
omit tat.. den i told him bout d matriculation things,he asked why am i still relaxing,asked me why i didnt appeal,why tis,why tat..
fine!!!!!!
i hung up d call by saying,"BYE BYE,i go n settle everything NOW!!!"
tat time was in d evening,i was just back home from badminton.. feeling tired n ended up being scolded by bro,imagine how was i feeling !!! arghh!!
on saturday,went to meet KC LEONG,he suggested us to go MCA to appeal for matriculation..
so,decided to went MCA on tuesday morning coz sunday n monday were holiday..
lai ling called me up n told me tat we needa prepare damn lots of stuffs for d appeal thingy..
again,vexed me!!!!!!!!
tat few days rili bloody hell busy wit these things!
my mum called d kampar MCA's ppl coz my relative noes him,easier to appeal..
she doesnt tell me tat she called d kampar MCA..
i have another way to appeal,a SECRET way,someone can help me..but oni i alone can appeal in tis way..
so,no matter how,on tuesday i still needa go ipoh MCA,or else my frens wont be able to appeal..
so,i have to drive them to ipoh for their sake,frens ma,so,nvm lar..
my mum ady asked help from kampar MCA,so i got no way to decline tat..
which means tat i need to prepare 3 SETS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
letter need to b written by hand,one for MCA,one for matriculation..
i need to send up those things to kampar MCA,ipoh MCA n my SECRET way..
went to skul to certify certs,called tis ppl,called tat ppl,went to buy tis n tat,went to my uncle's shop to certify things.,. arghh!!!
rili busy !!!!
yesterday n today oso went skul..
tomoro going to skul again..
went to post office today,tomoro going again..
wat kinda life is tis???!!!!!!!!!!
bout KTAR,now we got few choices to choose from,got few rooms to be rented..
ah len n me discussed for long but still havent make up our mind..
at last,decided to rent d room which costs 300 bucks..
we both will stay in d same room,so,150 bucks per person excluding d water bill etc..
from there to our campus will b 5 minutes by taxi n a bit longer by bus..
i asked my mum opinion n guess wat,she said,"dun noe u all !!"
ARGHHH !!!!!!!!
i was feeling terribly bad n she answered me wit an unsatisfied tone + insicere tone..
so,watever lar..
need to pay up d registration fees etc. by 6th of May,bout 600+ bucks.. n deposit for d room is bout 400+..
altogether 1000+ bucks..
if i get JPA scholarship or Matriculation or IPTA,d 1000+ bucks will b wasted..
i dun wan to burden my parents n i was hesitating much..
they scolded me,asked me not to worry so much bout d fees n etc..
for them mayb it's a small amount,but my nature is like tis,i dun like to burden them..
but i ended up being scolded..
parents n brother adviced n scolded me lots these few days..
just put urself in my shoes,how will u feel??
can u all please care bout my feeling??!!!
mayb u all care me too much,i understand tat my family loves me.. but somehow i feel so bad these few days..
yesterday i had a nightmare,today skipped meals again.. oni ate pineapple for d wholeday long..
arghhh!!!!
i feel like dying,too much vexation in mind !!
gonna leave perak in less than 20 days time,ah chow leaving malaysia to SG on 3rd or 4th of May..
arghhh !!!!
felt like myself going back to d psycho condition again,sitting alone thinking a lot,tears rolled down unnoticingly..
these few days,no matter wat was i doing,whenever i think these things,tears will automatically roll down..
haix haix haix !!!!
didnt went for badminton few days dy,too tired,too busy wit these things..
gonna have a farewell in these few days,they havent decide..
tat's all,got no mood to carry on !